Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We just shotgunned beers for America
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize