Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
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I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
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