: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a