so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize