This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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