I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
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I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
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so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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