it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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