I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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