Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(615): View more from Tennessee

i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.

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(216): View more from Ohio

She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.

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(425): View more from Washington

we turned his baptism video into a drinking game

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(903): View more from Texas

Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you

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(678): View more from Georgia

when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets

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(925): View more from California

I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.

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