There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
