I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!