I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
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I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
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