fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize