who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
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