some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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