I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize