i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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