The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me that man meat
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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