Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

A better fuck for starters.

Fav 34 1047 3533
share tweet
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?

(410): View more from Maryland

The recession has changed everything man.

Fav 9 3473 832
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(954): View more from Florida

Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.

Fav 38 924 4990
share tweet
(512): View more from Texas

You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?

Fav 16 3988 1282
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.

Fav 27 5005 1220
share tweet
(651): View more from Minnesota

I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.

Fav 7 3361 652
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(540): View more from Virginia

he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck

Fav 22 4012 1395
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'

Fav 6 2287 1117
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(361): View more from Texas

You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.

Fav 2 448 616
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT