i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
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