Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
