Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
porn star boner night. come get it.
then he tried to convert me to islam
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
