You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I take back everything I said about communal showers
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize