She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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