my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I just had sex on a roof
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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