I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
