once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
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You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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