I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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