i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think weed is turning my hair brown
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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