Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize