she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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