I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.