I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize