in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
