are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize