Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
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Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
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I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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