The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
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I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
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The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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