I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
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