why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
my nose is crying tears of wow.
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