at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize