Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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