So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...