Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.