Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(615): View more from Tennessee

i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm

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(843): View more from South Carolina

you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever

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(773): View more from Illinois

I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?

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(973): View more from New Jersey

and then he started using my ass as a stressball

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(904): View more from Florida

Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.

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(214): View more from Texas

Maybe I should forgo underwear.

(314): View more from Missouri

This is a family BBQ no?

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(917): View more from New York City

I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina

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(630): View more from Illinois

I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.

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