You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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