My sheets look like a crime scene.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
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This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
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So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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