so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize