How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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