Texts From Last Night

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  (574): View more from Indiana

  I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?

  (1-574): View more from Indiana

  Predator. Straight up.

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  (574): I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator? (1-574): Predator. Straight up. http://tfl.nu/63zz
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  (941): View more from Florida

  She is totally STD

  (941): View more from Florida

  Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD

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  (941): She is totally STD (941): Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD http://tfl.nu/ruv5
  Replies (52) Good night (957) Bad night (3970)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.

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  (702): So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college. http://tfl.nu/456d
  Replies (47) Good night (8607) Bad night (617)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.

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  (917): she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could. http://tfl.nu/cj4q
  Replies (74) Good night (3762) Bad night (17775) Order T-Shirt
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed

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  (205): I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed http://tfl.nu/lr4z
  Replies (18) Good night (1969) Bad night (3814) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.

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  (727): It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics. http://tfl.nu/z8vb
  Replies (6) Good night (718) Bad night (4093) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.

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  (919): I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three. http://tfl.nu/4nlq
  Replies (8) Good night (918) Bad night (2837)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious

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  (716): I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious http://tfl.nu/9ib6
  Replies (14) Good night (3277) Bad night (666) Order T-Shirt
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.

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  (225): Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe. http://tfl.nu/nl8k
  Replies (5) Good night (1844) Bad night (901) Order T-Shirt
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.

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  (605): Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs. http://tfl.nu/6a2k
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  (845): View more from New York

  you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god

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  (845): you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god http://tfl.nu/778n
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night

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  (+44): i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night http://tfl.nu/5yd2
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.

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  (205): Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink. http://tfl.nu/5avj
  Replies (5) Good night (765) Bad night (333)
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  (914): View more from New York

  It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you

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  (914): It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you http://tfl.nu/ff5c
  Replies (8) Good night (1285) Bad night (224) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.

  (619): View more from California

  he what???

  (760): View more from California

  Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.

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  (760): He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came. (619): he what??? (760): Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans. http://tfl.nu/7sag
  Replies (6) Good night (1760) Bad night (169)

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