sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize
