It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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